These were inspired by the Tumblr page Rules For My Unborn Son as well as other father-son advice quotes we found across the internet.
60 Rules for my Unborn Son:
Treat women with the utmost respect.
Never shake a man’s hand sitting down.
If she asks for your help opening a jar, you better damn well open it.
In a negotiation, never make the first offer.
Stand up for the little guy.
Open doors for EVERYONE.
Act like you’ve been there before. Especially in the end zone.
If you are blessed with the ability to wink, use it.
Request the late check-out.
When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
If you’re going to drive a hard bargain, you better have exact change.
Don’t let the pictures become the event.
Be subtle. She sees you.
“Yesterday’s home runs don’t win today’s games.” -Babe Ruth
Dress for the job you want, not for the one you have.
Be optimistic. Always pack a bathing suit.
Hold your heroes to a higher standard.
Good clothes open all doors.
Give credit. Take the blame.
Every hat should serve a purpose. That purpose ceases when you step inside.
Return a borrowed car with a full tank of gas.
Never cheat on your barber.
Never give an order that can’t be obeyed.
Don’t fill up on bread.
Eat fewer ingredients.
When shaking hands, grip firmly and look him in the eye.
A handshake beats an autograph.
If the enemy is in range, so are you.
Don’t let a wishbone grow where a backbone should be.
Don’t miss the team photo.
If you need music on the beach, you’re missing the point.
You marry the girl, you marry her whole family.
Be like a duck. Remain calm on the surface and paddle like crazy underneath.
Experience the serenity of traveling alone.
Never turn down a breath mint.
Never be afraid to ask out the best looking girl in the room.
Take a vacation from the Internet.
Return a lost wallet.
In a game of HORSE, sometimes a simple free throw will get ’em.
A sport coat is worth 1000 words.
Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first girlfriend.
Try writing your own eulogy. Never stop revising.
Attend the funerals of great men.
If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.
Eat lunch with the new kid.
More times than not, you will be judged by your shoes.
After writing an angry email, read it carefully. Then delete it.
Don’t play the ace if you can win with the king.
Ask your mom to play. She won’t let you win.
Don’t get drunker than the boss.
Give credit. Take the blame.
Forget the present. Write dad a letter.
Write down your dreams.
There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs ain’t one.
College does not count unless you graduate.
Don’t burn bridges.
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